Regrets

Happened to think thru' my life thus far. The 'i should haves..', 'what ifs..', 'if only then..', 'i wish i have...'. Certain regrets in life will always remain as they are. No matter how long it had already been, how many times you tried giving yourself excuses or how contented you tried to be with what you've gained in the otherwise. Since that particular supposedly 'right' decision made, and so not what what my heart wanted, life seemed to have changed so drastically for the then strong-willed, enthusiatic, full of drive and initiative butterfly. I've past by people whom i should have met much earlier, people who then, i dint know would add to my life, opportunities and the environment to be what i wanted to be. Tots that have been following me every now and then since ~6 years back. I shouldnt have listened to the SHOULDs. I must be a fool. The world stupidest fool.

And life goes on since then. Time passed. But know what, my life...'ended' there. For those who've been with me past my 'depression' period, you know how much it affected me. And bad news is, it still is. lol. Now you know how important it is, to live without regrets. My life will nv be complete in this life, as this regret will always be there, no matter how hard i did try to make up. And dear frens, i do still desire to start anew, to undo and to follow my heart. Just back to that particular day will do...just back to that particular decision day...... i shouldnt have let my family decide my life..

Nowdays, everytime when my frens, colleagues or i talked abt it, i cant help but wish i could have just bang my head and died. I hate myself for all that.
So dear friends, follow your heart and dont make decisions you will regret. If you think something will make you happy, GO FOR IT! We only live once.