Heart, Mind & Expectations

We grow up, with values imparted by family, by the society. We are expected to be prim and proper. We ought to be filial, helpful and reasonable. We have to learn to stand up on our own, be independent and capable. We should be responsible for our actions and be accountable to friends,family and the society. We are expected to perform to a certain standard. We are expected to withhold our integrity, dignity and pride to the utmost level. We shouldnt fail-for ourselves, for others.

And then, your mind tells you the same thing. Logical and reasoning thinking. Cool it. You know you should do this. You know you shouldnt do that. You got to understand, empathise and put yourself in others shoe. You remember the teachings. You hold on to values, beliefs and society norms. You tell yourself to be the best person you can be. You tell yourself, this is not you. Struggle. You and your inner self.

Then your feelings, emotions. Something that couldnt very much be reasoned. You just feel certain ways in certain situations. You feel differently with different people. React differently to situations and etc. The only thing you can put this in control is use your mind to put a stop to it, or at least, stop yourself from feeling certain way. Sometimes, i feel emotions are such scary thing....can just make you insane and behave nonsensically. Yet, sometimes, it brings you this sense of sweetness in a way...

In this pragmatic society, where one always get judge by others..what's deem right, what's deem wrong...what SHOULD be done...what SHOULDNT be done...and when your heart and mind are in conflict, what to follow? and you find yourself torn...between you, yourself and the society...once again...